Since coming on staff here in GA with The World Race, I have had a number of opportunities to dive into conversation with young adults who are considering taking part in the World Race adventure and with participants who have been accepted to go on The World Race. Once racers are accepted to a specific race, they are assigned to a team blog where they can communicate with others who will be embarking on this journey with them, and we, as staff have the opportunity to read what they are posting. The following is a blog I read this morning written by Kirsten George, one of the June 2010 racers. Her words really struck a chord in my heart. My heart races when Lord reveals His heart to His children and leads them to share His goodness with those around them! I hope Kirsten's words resonate with your Spirit as much as they did mine!
KIRSTEN's Heart...
I
am so grateful tonight. Who am I that God thinks so highly of me? I
have recently been forced to take a long good look at my life.
All of my sins, my mistakes, my failures. I've had to look at it
all. Just tonight. I was having a serious discussion with a brand new
roommate and old unknown friend. I was faced with the decision to tell
her that everything I have gone through was somehow worth it. I could
have lied, and told her that my damaged past was worth it to feel this
healthy when it really wasn't.
But somehow, I was able to look her straight in the eyes, and
say,"All of the crap I have gone through, all the poor choices, all the
evil sins and situations God let me get fall into, was WORTH it because
it has gotten me to this place. The place where I can say for the first
time that I feel healthy. I feel alive. I finally feel loved and
independent."
And it's all about God. He has brought me through all of these
trials and tribulations to meet me here, at a place where I can lift
another up. My sister is hurting. She is in pain, unsure of what God
has in store for her life, and I (hopefully) was able to bring her some
sort of hope, because I was able to say: "I was there. I understand.
And I got through with His help, and you can too."
The fact that God somehow counts me worhty to help another person,
someone who I look up to and respect, is amazing. I feel like Aaron or
Hur who held up the arms of Moses when the Israelites fought the
Amalekites. Who am I to help someone as respected as Moses? As
knoweldgable as Solomon? As powerful as David?
And yet, God chose me, for such a time as this, the way he chose
Ester. . . I am beyond blown away. I didn't know that I would EVER
amount to ANYTHING as far as the Kingdom of God is concerned, and now,
I know that if I don't bridge this gap NOW it may forever be uncrossed.
God has shown me Love, how could I not share that with others? We
are all a beautiful disaster, and God is constantly seeking to show us
love, to heal us of our broken hearts and our bloody scars. The healing
is what hurts the most, but the health it leaves us with is WORTH any
pain it takes to get there.
Jesus knew this. That's why He died on that cross. He knew how
badly His father wanted to be reconciled with us, and so Jesus took the
pain we could not endure to bring us back. To heal us from the death of
our sins, Jesus openly received our wounds so that He would know how to
heal us. Yes, He healed people in His life, but how many more did He
heal in His death?
So let me die to myself. Let me face MORE trials and MORE
tribulations if it allows me to understand the hurting. Bring the pain
and the sorrow if It shows me how to heal a wound or share a smile. It
is so worth it. To know that you're not alone, and to show others they
aren't alone. So worth it.
It's been 37 days since the Earthquake in Haiti, and I have to admit that I have been rather distant from everything that is going on--not because I don't care and not because I'm not concerned. It's simply because I have busied myself with other things.
I had the opportunity this morning to sit in on a presentation by Seth Barnes (founder of AIM) and Clint Bokelman (head of the short term missions department at AIM). As Clint shared his heart and the experiences he had in his three day trip to Haiti, my heart broke. Clint told story after story about people he met and the experiences he had while he was there, but what he really drove home was the PRESENCE of our Father's KINGDOM IN HAITI. Each story he told oozed with truth about the glory and majesty of GOD. He spoke consistently about the work that GOD IS doing in Haiti. He told story after story about the church rising up in Haitian communities and pouring out praise and thanksgiving for all that God has given them.
The reality of faith and God's Kingdom in the hearts of these people humbles me again and again. I've sat at home for the last 4 weeks, eating my fill, sleeping on a bed with a roof overhead and an abundance of water to drink--and yet I have become frustrated with the Lord time and again in this short period of time and have expressed those frustrations to Him as if I was actually entitled to something. I have neglected to praise Him and honor Him and have lacked, nothing.
I stand in agreement with what the Father is doing in Haiti. My Spirit stirs and roars when I hear the truth in Clint's stories. I want you to see the heart that I see--our Father's heart for this nation (Haiti), OUR nation (USA) and the nations around the world! The Kingdom of God isn't just coming, it is here--alive in you and me, and we are called to action--to be His hands and feet and to share HIS truth!
I encourage you to set aside some time to read Clint and Seth's blogs and the blog on our Haiti blog page. The Father is pouring Himself out--He is there! Don't miss HIM!! I pray that God would give you eyes to see HIM moving in Haiti and around the world.
If the Lord has laid it on your heart to be a light to the Haitian people, I pray that you would pursue that yearning. Below is a link to to some of the opportunities offered through AIM but I would encourage you to pursue a partnership wherever the Lord leads you!
This page has all the listed trips available as of now. Most are 7 days, some are 9, some are 14 days; for the next 6 months.
This is the main site.
"For God so LOVED THE WORLD, that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." John
3:16
"GREATER LOVE has NO ONE than this,
that He LAY DOWN HIS LIFE for His friends." John
15:13
"Love
is
patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not
proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily
angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil,
but rejoices with the TRUTH. It always protects, always trusts, always
hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails..." 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a
Many blessings as you celebrate the ones you love!
The New Year seems to be starting off in full sprint.When I pause for moment and look back
on where the Lord has taken me in the last 18 months, I am truly amazed.He has molded, moved, and shaped my
life in some powerful and significant ways.It's crazy to think that it all started with a prompting to
go into missions for a year.Little did I know that "running away with the Lord" for this time would
have the impact on my life that it has.
As I prepare to move forward on this path the Lord has let before
me, I find myself reflecting on the events of this past year.The Lord used the race to open my eyes
and fan a flame in my heart for the nations and for His seeing His Kingdom
around the world.
Before leaving for GA on Monday, I will be giving a presentation
at church about my experiences this last year.The video below is a compilation of photos I collected while
I was out in the field.I thought
I would share this with you as a way of celebrating all the Lord has done and
all He is going to do in the year to come!
and the truth and the truth will set you free."--John 8:32
On the race, our squad (G squad) was known as squad "FREEDOM"--whoot, whoot! I couldn't tell you the exact story behind this label or nickname, but at some point, this is how we became known around the AIM office. A good portion of our time in debrief on the race was spent being set free and being taught to claim the freedom and victory we have in Christ over our own lives as well as the lives of those we encountered in ministry. Being in the community of fellow racers, this proclamation of victory was often made for me by my brothers and sisters in Christ when I couldn't make it for myself. The Lord recently reminded me of the importance and need to claim these things over my life.
The last several days have been a challenge for me. Since the day after Christmas, the Lord has been really tugging on my heart. As I've drawn near to Him, He has begun revealing to me that there are some "weeds from the past" if you will, that have found a home and rooted themselves deep in my heart. The Lord has been revealing my need to allow Him to dig deep to the root of these weeds and let Him exterminate them there. I began to sense that this process was going to hurt, and began resisting Him, in fear. This isn't the first time I've resisted His attempts to pull out some of these weeds. I resisted His attempts on the race, and He didn't fight me. However, recently, I've been hearing Him whisper, "It is time" and quite frankly, I'm exhausted of fighting.
These weeds seem to wrap themselves tightly around on my heart and in the process I lose sight of my identity in Christ and the victory I have been given in Him. I know, deep down that this is an attack of the enemy but in the weakness of my flesh I choose to listen to his lies instead of the truth that has been spoken over my life before.
Those of you who know me know that the Lord often speaks to me through music. I can be in the midst of worship and moved to tears because the Lord is revealing Himself to me in a song. That happened today as I was riding home from brunch with my family. The last several days I have been praying that the Lord would take me to those hard places--that He would continue to show me where I needed to go in order to break free from these past hurts, these weeds that bind my heart and hold me down. In His faithfulness, He's taken me there, and it has been painful.
Despite the fact that I've asked Him to take me to the places that hurt, I've found myself frustrated with the Lord because I wanted or expected the process to look different than it has. I wanted it to be quick and easy but instead it's been long and hard. I know in my heart that my feelings towards God aren't justified, but I they have been welling up anyway. This peaked in church this morning during worship. I forced myself to raise my hands in surrender anyway to glorify the King, but my heart was still filled with hurt and frustration. You see, I was blaming the Lord, even resenting Him for what I was feeling, although the hurt is a result of the world and it's brokenness and some of the decisions I made when I was not walking closely with God. In addition to my frustration with the Lord, I was frustrated with myself--frustrated that I was taking this out on the Him, know it is not something I'm supposed to do. After all, what has the Lord ever done to hurt me?!--Nothing! And to make matters even more complicated, in the midst of this mess, He LOVES me.
So, as I got into my car after brunch, I turned on the radio and heard an old, familiar song. But this time, the words hit me hard--harder than ever before:
Here I am Lord,
And I'm drowning
In a sea of forgetfulness
The chains of yesterday surround me
I yearn for peace and rest
I don't want to end up where you found me
And it echoes in my mind,
Keeps me awake tonight
I know you cast my sin as far as the east is from the west
And I stand before you now as,
As though I've never sinned
But today I feel like I'm just one mistake away
From you leaving me this way
Jesus can you show me
Just how far the east is from the west
Cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
Rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest,
Cause you know just how far the East is from the West
From one scarred hand to the other.
I start the day the war begins
Endless reminding of my sin
And time and time again your truth is drowned out
By the storm I'm in
Today I feel like I'm just one mistake away,
From you leaving me this way
Jesus can you show me,
Just how far the East is from the West
Cause I can't bear to see the man I've been
Come rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest
'cause you know
Just how far the East is from the West
From one scarred hand to the other.
I know you've washed me white,
Turned my darkness into light
I need your peace to get me through,
To get me through this night
Can't live by what I feel
But by the Truth your work reveals,
I'm not holding on to you
But you're holding on to me,
You're holding on to me
Jesus you know
Just how far the East is from the West
I don't have to see the man I've been,
Come rising up in me again
In the arms of your mercy I find rest
'cause you know just how far the East is form the West,
From one scarred hand to the other.
Sometimes in the midst of pain and hurt, I forget about the REDEMPTION I have in Christ. I forget that I am covered in the blood of my Savior and that I am FREE and CLEAN in the eyes of the Lord. Christ took on this bondage that I have been living in when He was hung on the cross at Calvary and He BROKE those very chains when He rose from the dead on Easter Sunday! The weeds take root in my heart and remain there ONLY because I allow them to. Just as I have a choice to take up my cross daily and follow Him, I have a choice to walk FREE because of the victory HE claimed for me--the same is is true for YOU!
As we step into a New Year, I think it's important to remind ourselves of the truths that we have in Christ and to make a habit of claiming these truths over our lives and the lives of one another. Will you join me and claim FREEDOM over OUR lives again?!
I pray, Lord God, that we would not forget this freedom we've found in you. I pray too that we would share this freedom with our friends, family and even strangers in our lives. May we see this VICTORY take root in our own lives and claim the lives of others for your Kingdom! I ask all these things in Jesus' name...Amen.
I started reading a book today called The Tangible Kingdom
by Hugh Halter and Matt Smay.The
introduction of the book begins with an illustration of a sailor, sailing his
ship on the open sea headed for an island that he has heard about and desires
to reach.This island is not easy
to get to because of the wreckage that surrounds it-wreckage from other ships
that have attempted to reach shore and failed or ships that have gotten caught
in a storm and are waiting for the storm to pass before navigating the rest of
the way in.This picture of the
sailor is a metaphor for the church and the island is God's Kingdom.The wreckage represents people and
communities who have been lost and wounded on their journey to find the true
Kingdom-not just eternal life, but God's life and reality here on earth.
For the longest time, I went through life as a part of the
church not knowing that this earthy Kingdom existed.I thought Christianity was simply about accepting Christ as
my Savior, telling my friends about my love for Jesus and being "good like the
Bible tells you to", for the rest of my life.It wasn't until December 2007 that I began to hear that
gentle whisper of my Spirit, calling me to embrace the glory and wonder of God
on this side of Heaven-The Kingdom.
This whisper lead me to The World Race, and it was through
my time at training camp and over the course of the last 14 months that I began
to understand more and more what God's Kingdom here on earth could and should
look like.It's different than any
view of "church" I have ever been exposed to, but it has brought life,
authenticity, transparency and community to me and to others.
In the last year, on and off the race, the Lord has begun to
open my eyes to His reality-His Kingdom here on earth.I don't know if you have noticed it,
but there is a restlessness rising in generations across the globe.The concept of Christianity as we know
it is not satisfying them or us.Our Spirits are aching, yearning for something MORE!I believe this is the Lord, calling His
bride, THE CHURCH, back to Himself.He is calling a generation to rise up and proclaim His truth to the
world-not as a denomination but as HIS BODY!
12For just as the body
is one and has many members, and all the members of the body, though many, are
one body, so it is with Christ. 13For in one Spirit we were all baptized into one body-Jews or
Greeks, slaves or free-and all were made to drink of one Spirit...14For the body does not
consist of one member but of many...20As it is, there are many parts, yet one body...27Now you are the body
of Christ and individually members of it. -1Corinthians
12 ESV
The Lord has equipped us each in
a special way to contribute to the overall function of His body at work on
earth.He is calling us to respond
to His love and bring life and hope to our friends, families, neighbors and
people across the globe.The key
is finding a vision and a community to work together towards this common goal
that the Lord has called us to.We
aren't called to simply worship and love the Lord within the safety of four
walls or one specific community, but to go out as THE CHURCH and multiply-make
disciples!
The World Race has become that
community for me.Their vision and
their passion have fanned the flame in my heart.For this reason, I have chosen to become a part of their
ministry.Starting in January, I
will begin a 6-month apprenticeship with them in hope of finding a better
understanding of how the Lord might use me and my gifts to help them move
forward with their God given vision.This position is one where I am required to raise support once
again.Therefore, I am asking you
to prayerfully consider supporting me in this ministry, either prayerfully,
financially, or both.
My prayer for you is that you
will hear the Lord's calling for as well.Although I love The World Race, I believe there are members of the BODY
all over the world with a vision to see God's Kingdom here on earth.I pray that you will respond to the
whisper of the Spirit inside you and be mobilized in some way shape or form in
your own family, community or if He calls you, among the nations!
9Only take heed to
thyself, and keep thy soul diligently, lest thou forget the things which thine
eyes saw, and lest they depart from thy heart all the days of thy life; but
make them known unto thy children and thy children's children. -Deuteronomy 4:9
ASV
Posted in Faith Journey by Jessica McVey on 9/6/2009
**The following is a blog that my teammate Carly posted a couple of days ago. I am re-posting it because I think she paints a very REAL and accurate picture of the things many of us have been processing lately, myself included. I love you Carly! I thank God for giving you the ability to articulate your thoughts and your heart so beautifully!**
I have to
remember things. I'm struggling with feeling like the past year was
even real, and because of that I want to work harder to remember the
stories. Ones that are so simple and easy and sweet that they should
not be forgotten. I want to remember them as if reminiscing with those
I experienced them with, and to feel the flavor and touch of God
through them.
It's harder than I thought being back, though not in the way I thought. Rather
than feeling misplaced and misunderstood, I feel too comfortable, too
the same. If Satan is going to reach me in these next few months it's
going to be by siphoning my Race experience away into oblivion. Did it
happen? Have I already left? Or will I wake up tomorrow and travel to
the airport to begin the whole experience?
The Race is only supposed to be 11 months. I have no doubt of that. No doubt of the importance of coming home for a season. After
all, my heart was made to be romanced, and if it had continued the Race
would have had the opportunity to become my romancer. I loved
it. I loved the cultures that I witnessed, experienced, slept in and
smelled of. I loved the ministry, and have never felt more alive than
when on my knees in the dirt before someone, receiving a word from the
Lord just for them. I miss my brothers and sisters with an ache I
didn't think possible.
In
time, the Race could have become the way I experienced the Lord. Some
people require a good book, or an inspirational teaching or a
heartbreaking experience to put longing in their heart. I required the unfamilar, the challenge, to discover more of God and, inadvertently, more of me. And
now I'm in an environment that is familiarly me. People who have known
me when I was pooping my diapers. A house I can navigate with my eyes
closed. And a past that speaks of more years without the Lord then
knowing Him. And Satan whispers, this is who you are, nothing has changed.
And in some ways it hasn't. I'm
still a girl who loves floating out to the middle of the lake, or
spending an hour serving tennis balls. I can still get so lost in a
book I don't hear my name called, and ice cream is my food group of
choice. But at the same time, everything has changed. The
Nations whisper my name with a familiarity and I will return to them in
time. The kingdom of God beckons at my doorstep and I anoint my house
in His love. I pray in tongues when driving my car and prophesy life
and truth into those I know. And I remember what has been prophesied
over me.
I
remember without living in the past. I remember so I can share with
others, and to pour out the thousands of blessings from the past as an
offering to God.
"You
can never set apart for God something that you desire for yourself to
achieve your own satisfaction. If you try to satisfy yourself with a
blessing from God, it will corrupt you. You must sacrifice it, pouring
it out to God-something that your common sense says is an absurd
waste... we can be lustful in things that are not sordid and vile... if
you are always keeping blessings to yourself and never learning to pour
out anything "to the Lord," other people will never have their vision
of God expanded through you." –Oswald Chambers (9/3)
Be
careful of what you hold too tightly to. God is the only thing we
should cling to. And even then we must be willing to let our vision and
understanding of Him to be transformed, as He is a living and active
God.
Posted in Faith Journey by Jessica McVey on 9/6/2009
Its been 5 days and I still have moments when it is hard to believe I am home. I must confess that the initial shock of being physically separated from my community combined with the culture shock the comes with our return to America has hit me harder than I anticipated. I couldn't tell you why, but I definitely expected a smoother transition home. One of the questions I have faced time and again the last several days is: "What's next?" and I have to admit that this is a question I often dread. I dread the question because my answer is "I don't know." In this time of transition, I am simply waiting on the Lord. I'm waiting for Him to speak clearly because my mind is currently flooded with a whirlwind of thoughts and emotions that cloud my ability to make a clear decision. Although the Race has taught me a great deal about patience and the value of waiting on the Lord, I must confess that my flesh has a tendency to be rather IMPATIENT.
This week I have asked myself many times what I am supposed to do while I am WAITING on the Lord. I don't know how long I will He is calling me to wait, but I know that I want to be actively involved in something while I am waiting for Him to illuminate the path He has set before me. This morning, while getting ready for church, the Lord spoke and answered this question very clearly as I listened to a song by John Waller for the very first time. The words to the song were so real, they brought me to tears. I knew the moment I heard the second line that my Heavenly Father was speaking to me and making it clear exactly what He is calling me to do as I wait. Ironically, it is exactly what I have been doing for the last 11 months--loving, serving, worshiping, praying and watching Him move in the lives of those around me. I stand in awe of His patience, gentleness and faithfulness towards me yet again.
I want to share this song with you--lyrics below with a YouTube video to follow. Perhaps it will touch your heart the way it touched mine this morning. I ask you to please keep both me and my team in your prayers this week as we continue to go through this transition back home and into this new season of our lives. Thank You.
While I'm Waiting
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait
I will move ahead, bold and confident
Takeing every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait
I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord
Posted in Faith Journey by Jessica McVey on 8/31/2009
Psalm
63
O
God, you are my God;
I
earnestly search for you.
My
soul thirsts for you;
My
whole body longs for you
In
this parched and weary land
Where
there is no water.
I
have seen you in your sanctuary and gazed upon your power and glory.
Your
unfailing love is better than life itself;
How
I praise you!
I
will praise you as long as I live,
Lifting
up my hands to you in prayer.
You
satisfy me more than the richest feast.
I
will praise you with songs of joy.
I
lie awake thinking of you,
Meditating
on you through the night.
Because
you are my helper,
I
sing for joy in the shadow of your wings.
I
cling to you;
Your
strong right hand holds me securely.
But
those plotting to destroy m will come to ruin.
They
will go down into the depths of the earth.
They
will die by the sword and become the food of jackals.
But
the king will rejoice in God.
All
who trust in him will praise him,
While
liars will be silenced.
I've been camped out in various parts of this Psalm for the
last several months and it has spoken to my heart in various ways.As the race comes to an end here in the
next day or two, I feel as though this truly is the cry of my heart.When I try to find the words to explain
what the last 11 months have been for me, I'm at a loss.This Psalm describes everything that is
in my heart right now-the things I have learned, the things that have touched
my heart, and the things I have wrestled with before the Lord this year are all
here in this Psalm.
The Lord truly HAS become my strength and my song.There is no one and nothing that my
heart yearns for more when I wake in the morning and in the evening before I go
to bed.My thoughts are on Him
throughout the day.Some days I am
struggling and questions are plowing through my mind, while other days, my
heart is filled with joy and praise. The greatest realization I have had this year is that the
Lord desires intimacy with each and every one of us-He pursues us and deeply
desires for us to pursue Him and the things of His heart.
This last month was very precious to me.I spent the last 6 weeks of ministry
fasting from the intranet.My intention
in fasting was to make myself fully available for what the Lord had in store
each and every day during our last month and a half of ministry.The result: I met with the Lord in a
variety of relationships and conversations with my teammates and I fell in love
with the Nicaraguan people.We
spent the month doing a variety of ministries in Granada, two of which found a
special place in my heart: 1) tutoring young girls at an orphanage in town and
2) feeding program/relational ministry at the dump (see Carly's video).Through these ministries and building
relationship with people from the community, I began to see the Lord's heart
for this place.I see a thirst and
a hunger in the people for the Lord-they are searching and I see the Lord
moving through El Puente (the AIM base) and the churches in the community to
draw people to himself, and it moves me in some of the deepest places in my
heart.There is a beauty in
Granada that the Lord is waiting to unveil and it's starting in this
community.I pray I will live to
see this community come alive and shine with the TRUE glory of the Lord.
